Forgiveness comes fairly easy for me. I have had some tremendous hurts done to me over the years and in almost all of the circumstances have found it in my heart to forgive and move on. But, of all the people that have hurt me the most, the one that I’m the closest to, I can’t seem to forgive. I really don’t see this person much. In fact I only see him a few times a day. But he is always present; ready to stick his nose in when it doesn’t belong.
This person has a habit of kicking me when I am already down. He continually reminds me of all the times I have failed, of all the times I have screwed up. He tells me what a horrible job I am doing with my kids. He is quick to point out all of my faults when I am dealing with my wife. He lets me know what a disrespectful child I was to my mom. He even likes to tell me what I failure I am professionally.
I try not to listen to him. I try not to let him have the run of the conversation, but he always seems to win. I have asked Jesus what he thinks of the situation and why I can’t seem to forgive him. But when Jesus starts talking, I can barely hear him. The person I can’t forgive starts screaming at me, telling me that I could never be good enough to have a conversation with the savior.
So today, I stand face to face with this man; the man in the mirror. I forgive him for all of the hurtful things he has said to me. I forgive him for feeding me lies. I forgive him for intruding on my peace. I forgive him for leading me astray. From this day forward I declare freedom from this man. I declare freedom from myself.